In the past, I could never understand people who led intensely active lifestyles and claimed they simply “enjoyed it.”
I just didn’t believe it. I was convinced that they were hiding another motive: perhaps they felt they needed to exercise X amount in order to eat X amount, or they felt they wouldn’t maintain their weight without X hours of cardio, or they felt their physique would be lost if they missed out on some movement. I know those opinions aren’t completely unfounded: there do happen to be a lot of people who suffer from those thoughts.
I used to be one of them. Back then, I always associated exercise with the body and with food, and that mindset created an inability to comprehend how anyone would possibly choose to move simply “because.”
while coming to the following revelations, i also enjoyed salad heaven: baby spinach, string beans, jicama, avocado, champagne mango, dressed simply in a T of olive oil.
This morning, I went to a new yoga class. One of the effects of my Bikram month has been the realization that I need to practice more often in a studio. I can supplement classes with my own at-home practice, but I can’t go back to being by my lonesome 100% of the time. It just isn’t the same. In order to do that, however, I also need to be a bit thrifty, and I’m therefore currently on a hunt for every yoga deal in lower Manhattan [more on that another time].
Today, the deal was a 90 minute Kundalini yoga class for $12 at New Field Yoga, a relatively new studio that happens to be next door to one of my old NYU dorms in the Financial District. [I do mean old. I lived there in 2004.]
Kundalini yoga was completely new to me, and it was much more spiritual and far less physical than I am used to. But I like trying new things, and there was nothing I would rather have been doing at 10 AM than sitting on a yoga mat.
with salad heaven came greek yogurt heaven: stir an extra large spoonful of almond butter into fage 2%. drizzle with just a touch of maple syrup. sigh in happiness.
After class, as I walked home, totally energized in the perfect spring air, I began to wonder what it would be like to go for a run. Aside from very occasional discomfort affected by certain weather patterns or days on which I’ve done too much walking, my knees have really been fine. I don’t intend to ever be “a runner” again, but I’ve been getting curious about the possibility of going out for a couple miles every now and then. [The last time I tried this out, it didn't go so well.]
I arrived back home, downed some water, swapped my yoga shorts for gym shorts, laced up my sneakers [orthotics in place inside them], grabbed my keys, and headed back outside. The sun was shining. The breeze was strong. The air was comfortable. I ran down to Battery Park, over to the Hudson. I stopped and gazed out at the murky water, at the beauty of the city behind me. There was nothing I would rather have been doing at 12 PM than moving out there in my running shoes. [No knee pain yet, by the way.]
in addition to being one of those people who like to be active, i am also a person who really loves healthy things. new flavor of kombucha. on sale. yum.
As I prepared my lunch this afternoon, I had to reflect on my personal growth. I wasn’t eating because of my active morning. I was eating because it was lunchtime, and I was hungry. I didn’t dwell on how much to eat, or whether I should eat more or eat less. [Don't be concerned, I don't have a problem eating enough.]
I’m not going to spend all my free time exercising, because there is a lot more to me than my love of yoga. But today, I went to yoga class and I went for that run because it felt good. I went because sometimes, just as I have days on which I want to be in a theater or browse ten thrift stores or dine excessively, I also have days on which I just want to move. For me, that doesn’t entail fulfilling challenges or abiding by a training plan; it just means enjoying – no, reveling in – my young energy. This morning, I did just that.
Has your relationship with exercise changed over time? What drives you to move now?
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I am so inspired by how far you have come, Leslie. I just posted about the reasons I exercise… I swing back and forth (wildly) about why I exercise- it’s an ongoing process to keep it healthy. I think the key thing for me is finding an activity that I truly love- since I stopped dancing, exercise hasn’t been the same for me and it’s hard to find a balance between what I enjoy and what I feel obligated to do.
dear leslie, you are amazing. the end.
but really! i love how everything you blog about sincerely resonates on so many levels with me. i really enjoyed reading this!!
I love this post! My relationship with exercise has definitely changed. When I first started exercising, it was a way to lose weight and it quickly spiraled out of control. I stopped enjoying running because I was malnourished and simply doing it to justify eating. After almost 8 months of regaining weight and recovering, I started running again with my mom. Not too often and not too far. I realized how great it feels to run for enjoyment. Right now, I’m almost at my “goal” weight, so I’m still looking to gain. But I run. And I enjoy it. And the extra food I’m eating? Gives me energy to run and not feel terrible after.
Nicole G
I find I’ve been more active for the last ten years than I was in high school or college. Most of the increase stems from wanting to feel a sense of accomplishment (I could barely run for ten minutes in high school; now I can run for 30 – it feels great!), but I also want to maintain my weight. After turning thirty last year, I kept getting told how a lot of people start gaining weight in this decade. I feel like I’m at a healthy weight, and want to keep it.
I’ve become more active throughout the years because I have found more active activities that I really enjoy doing, and that get me out and moving! Now I love the challenge of signing up for a event and training for it. It gives me sometime to reach for!
I’m very delighted to say that exercise TRULY is, for me, a form of pleasure. It wasn’t always.
And I’m happy you enjoyed a little run. As long as it doesn’t turn into a compulsion or sense of obligation — you did it once, so now you have to start doing it all the time — that’s great.
I loved this post so much Leslie. You are a great writer- and I love how succinctly you get your point across.
I believe you are an inspiration to whoever reads your blog. I truly do love exercising, but I am constantly up and down in what is my “happy weight”. I love food and exercise both so much, that sometimes I overdue it on either ends (at different times in my life.) It’s harrrd finding the happy medium if you know what I mean. Especially while in school. Bottom line is just paying attention to what my body needs/feels at any given moment, and go with that.
Yeah, my relationship with exercise has totally evolved over the past 5 years or so. I’ve danced my whole life, but never considered that “exercise.” That was just fun. Once I graduated college and didn’t necessarily have so many opportunities to dance at my fingertips, it started to dawn on me I’d have to actually think about incorporating movement into my life, whereas before it had been preprogrammed with all the dance rehearsal. Once I started to have to think about it, though, it got ugly at times, like was I doing enough to compensate for too much ice cream last night? etc. But these days it’s more like, I really want to stay strong so that my body can handle whatever I throw at it for the next 50 years or so.
I went from sloth to classic over-exerciser (25 miles a day, anyone?) to compulsive treadmill number-watcher to my current blissed out yoga state. These days, whenever I feel compelled to do something, I immediately stop and look at my motivations. My Bikram and other yoga practices are less about physical results and more about mental clarity, community with other folks and taking time out for myself. I’m happy with my evolution.
There are a lot of donation only studio (times just had an article about this). There’s always Yoga for the People (St. Marks!) Miss youuuuuuuuuuuuu. xx